ARLEN, TX: Hank Hill, noted propane and propane accessories salesman, has been diagnosed with Autism.

According to a statement released by Hill’s doctors at Arlen Methodist Hospital, the diagnosis came after reviewing the Strickland employee’s obsession and idealization of propane, his emotional attachment to machinery such as his truck and lawnmower, his inappropriate relationship with his dog, and his inability to express affection.

“All these years I’ve been saying that that boy ain’t right,” said Hill when reached for comment. “Turns out it was me who ain’t right.”

Reports indicate that Hill has been taking the diagnosis with difficulty. Witnesses have seen Hill binge drinking in the alley behind his house.